I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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