she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize