Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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