Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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