Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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