i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
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