My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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