He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Can you bring me the toilet please
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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