the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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