I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize