i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
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I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
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i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
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