he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
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In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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