I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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