No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize