Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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