sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
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