Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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