You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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