and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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