We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
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Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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