i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize