I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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