Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
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is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
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I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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