i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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