I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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