so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
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All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
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