i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize