my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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