My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Non-Jews are for practice
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize