I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
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Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
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He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
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