that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
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I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
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It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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