I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
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