dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize