would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
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