WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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