dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
tequila makes me forget i have legs
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize