it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
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