Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I will pee on everything he values.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
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