I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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