what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Randomize