He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize