the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize