U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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