To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize