it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
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He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
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Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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