I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
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