I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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