my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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