Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
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