does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
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is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
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I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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